[No, what was stupid was just how much Nicky loved them both back and was still somehow considering leaving them for the church.
And that would be what it was, wouldn't it? Leaving them. They could say they'd all still be friends and that nothing would really change if he became a priest, but the truth was that it would change. Joe and Booker would be a temptation. A constant pull on his heart when it was supposed to be completely devoted to God and his purpose. Would he be able to deny that pull?
He remembered the gentle teases that had turned into gentle kisses that had turned into a night spent exploring each other's bodies instead of sleeping and..he didn't know. He honestly didn't and it was that thought more than anything that made him put down his fork and push aside his plate.
If he started seminar in a few weeks like he was supposed to, he would be saying good bye to the best friends he'd ever known and the two men who he loved with every fiber of his being.]
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Date: 2020-08-29 02:50 am (UTC)And that would be what it was, wouldn't it? Leaving them. They could say they'd all still be friends and that nothing would really change if he became a priest, but the truth was that it would change. Joe and Booker would be a temptation. A constant pull on his heart when it was supposed to be completely devoted to God and his purpose. Would he be able to deny that pull?
He remembered the gentle teases that had turned into gentle kisses that had turned into a night spent exploring each other's bodies instead of sleeping and..he didn't know. He honestly didn't and it was that thought more than anything that made him put down his fork and push aside his plate.
If he started seminar in a few weeks like he was supposed to, he would be saying good bye to the best friends he'd ever known and the two men who he loved with every fiber of his being.]
I...oh fuck.